A Week Well Spent
This week back from Goa was eventful!
Finally, my focus has moved away from hiring. I'm so happy that what used to take 100% of my time, is now dropping down to ~20. It feels amazing.
I've been doing a lot of complaining, trash-talking and bad-mouthing the founders because of how they treated Shrish. They were organizing 1:1 for appraisals with everybody in the company, but her and the FO, and it did feel a little on the nose, provided we had their calendars.
But I remember randomly one day, as a family when were at the dining table, we spoke for an hour. I loved it so much, somewhere in the back of my mind, I really treasured that moment. All four of us, joking about how Ma lords over us, setting up dad's spotify, discussing about recent passing of a couple of apt. people (Dr. Shanthi's husband) and just joking about stuff (Iran War, Supra and his urge to call the Creta his own) and having fun. In the midst of it, Dad starts talking about gratitude. Prompted by an exchange on Supra's urge to drive the Creta (from what I remember), he mentions of how whatever, you need to do, you should be grateful to god. It did feel a little on the nose, yet I can't help but take this as a warning from the universe to me. To not speak out of line for what I've been given, or about anybody.
This led me to reflect a lot, a combination of the above and a failed attempt of trying to lower my screen time (includes podcasts + audio listening) and have been thinking of how I want this year to move forward. I tried putting into action the past three days. It didn't fan out yet, but I have good, rough idea of what I want from 2026.
A year of the process, I call it.
The relationship is going good too. This includes familial and personal. I really am enjoying my time I spend w/ family, especially after the Goa trip. You really begin to view your parents differently once they begin telling tales of their lives.
They're human too, and have lived a life worth telling. One of my aims over the next two years is to pen it down. Lord knows, how many such tales have been lost just because people don't write!
Write about your loved ones, write about your parents. I know, what I read about what I write on my parents twenty years from now will be with a refreshed look, and a deeper appreciation.
Our family is a really different family. Not like the typical rich, or the typical middle class. I see my parents having a deep appreciation for life, tradition, religion and values while also dominating in their own fields. My father, who has dabbled in a series of business, been cheated of sums >1cr by faulty partners, has built himself to now on a Benz.
My mother bore the brunt of sexism, made fun of for her weight, installed servers like a IT coolie and has risen to the director of a company. Such stories aren't worth to be forgotten. Sure, they have some chinks. My dad's stubborn sometimes (very cutely so), and my mom's base audio level is a 100db (another cutie like that), but these are consequences of the life they've lived.
Their mannerisms, are shaped by the events and environments they were brought up in. To deeply appreciate that, and account for it, is I think my duty as a son. I have deep respect for them, and I'm grateful they're my parents. I wouldn't trade them for anyone else (Sorry Maa Kali).
I came mostly to this realisation by the beaches of Goa. For us to know treat a 5-star resort experience as a fun trip, riding 1000+ km in our Benz, is a privilege a few get.
For me, to enjoy it? I'm deeply grateful.
They don't even expect me to pay the accident loan back. They're just happy I still exist. I hope they see me succeed. And I hope I can pay them back both with the unconditional love the provide me, and with gifts galore.
Similarly, relationship-wise, I think I have Shrishti to thank. To think from where we were, to where we are? I'm baffled. I am eternally grateful that she'd forgiven me for the stupidity I'd expressed 6 years ago. For me to utter such statements, and for her to have the kindness to forgive, is rare.
But likewise, has been the approx. We've spent 4.5 years. She's been a pillar of support, a pillar that I sometimes feel I overuse. To hear my crude jokes, farts and tears, is a feat I'd never thought someone would. I still consider myself a work-in-progress, but I think that to accept someone broken is too great. To open up and show vulnerability of the highest order, is an expectation to great to ask from a human. For her to show it, I'm grateful for it.
For all the moments, she's given, she will give and is giving, I think I'm grateful for all.
I remember just being grateful for all of these as I approaches the mountains on the way to Medekatu. A part of my 2nd bike ride, I'd ridden on the 28th early to catch a glimpse at the Sangam. It's hard to ride solo, not because of the lack of company (that does sometimes get felt!) but because I'm not sure whether my luggage is safe! (from humans and monkeys alike!). Yet, the Eastern Ghats were a sight to bear. From East to West, one's eyes were only greeted by rolling hills.
Beautiful. Just beautiful.
Such vast nature, untouched by uncouth, and disgusting us. To look at the hills of Ramnagara, I just think. How many millenia would these mountains have stood, just looking down and greeting every passer-by a sight that'd be etched in their mind forever?
I realise what might I have lost if I'd perished in the accident. It dawns on me even further, as two deaths happened at Manipal. Couple, drunk-driving and died. Yeesh.
The routine I've set for myself, is something that isn't possible. And the Year of Process is just that. Mentally, I've come to accept moving out of India in 2027. Through Rhoades or to a US uni for an MFin degree, I will be gone for a few years. I want to make the most of this time.
With my friends, with my family and Mother Nature.